Kid's say some funny shit

Random quotes and antics... enjoy.

2 brothers, talking in Japanese in my class:

• Me - Talk in English guys...ENGLISH!
• Older Brother - C'mere c'mere c'mere baby (beconning to his younger brother)
• Younger Brother - No no no no (wagging his finger very coyly) no no... UNO! (we play a lot of UNO in this class)

So despite having a lot of knowledge, these kids only really know how to proposition hostess girls... and deny the advances of horny men. But wait...there's more:

• Me - (I talk about Baseball with these kids at the end of class usually) OK guys, how many strikes in an out?
• Them - 3!
• Me - Good. How many balls in a walk
• Older bro - How many balls does he have!
• Younger - How many balls does she have!
• Me - Class is over, go home

Playing radom learning games with a rather rambunctious young one today:

• Me - Please don't ever grab my balls again

An "emo" older kid I teach:

• Me - What did you do today?
• Student - I dunno
• Cmon, you had to have done something
• I slept
• Till 6pm ?!?!??
• I read comics
• Oh! Cool! Which ones?
• I dunno
• Cmon, just tell me one
• I dunno
• OK, what was the first one you read today
• I dunno
• What was the last one ou read then before class?
• I didn't read any comics today
• Oh...

5 years olds learning "We're going to the -------":

• Me - OK, please repeat... Beach!
• Them - Bitch!
• Say it 3 times. Beach Beach Beach
• Bitch Bitch Bitch!!!!
• (I'm laughing now)

• (louder) Bitch Bitch BITCH BITCH!!!! (now they are running around in circles yelling BITCH as loud as they can... and no one is the wiser)

Talking with a Japanese Teacher about a tough student I'm about to teach:

• Me - How is he today?
• Bad
• Damn
• But don't worry, He's scared of ghosts, and I told him if he hits you, says no, or doesn't go to class, ghosts will come and get him tonight
• ...

In a class of older girls:

• Me - What books do you like
• 12 year old girl - Saw 2
• Me - hunh?
• 12 y.o. - Here (takes out a paperback of 'Saw II'. Yes, the movie about the serial killer who makes people dive into a pool of dirty syringes, cut off their own feet, and carve open other living people to find a key in that person's stomach)
• Me - Ummm....